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Santim Raj, we saw earlier is a wanderer after his own soul. That was in the initial period of his journey. He was wandering after his own soul while his soul was doing its own wandering as was meant to be. The time will come when his wandering and the wandering of his soul would meet at the confluence of understanding – that state of true peace, true existence. Until that confluence is reached, he is destined to be confronted with the duality of his existence – his and his soul’s[1].
He remembers the dream he had. The dream that taught him the fruits of his mind and the fruits of his heart. The mind, a gift from the Supreme, which directs and redirects his very understanding of the creations around him. The heart, yet another gift, that yearns for the Truth and the light to guide him in the hour of darkness. As he basks in the happiness of his gifts, the nightmare came to him.
Everything is but a duality but for the Supreme who is One.
The nightmare of the mind. The mind that receives and processes all that the eyes perceive and perceive not. The mind that forms a conclusion or a misperception. The mind that has been fed with the thoughts, foolish tales and silly ways of his fathers. The traps within the intricacies of the mind.
1994, they speak of computers. Garbage in, garbage out. How graciously the Supreme sent out messages to the ungrateful servants, yet they hearken not to His message. We see not the mercy of His guidance for we are more excited with the toy. Wow, this is technology! We hear, yet we listen not. We see, yet we have become blind.
Garbage in, garbage out. Truth in, Truth surround.
When are you going to stop clicking the mouse to see what message the computer is meant to relay to you?
Click, click, click all the way to grave.
And who wants to meditate on whether the food for his mind is garbage or Truth? The shield of ego and defence mechanism can only be penetrated with the needle of humility and subservience to the Supreme. The maya of results is a potent distracter, in all its forms, from the path to the Truth. And the enemy of your soul is you.[2]
The virtue is in the doing, not in the expecting. If your doing must bear the results, then you usurp the powers of the Supreme. The servant does, the Supreme dictates. You are but a minute imagination of the Supreme. Accept this or live this temporary life in futility.
The mind that focuses only on the result is prone to egoism and frustration. Achievement leads to egoism. Egoism leads to self worship. Self worship sets forth illusions of godliness, the recipe for self destruction..
Failure to achieve leads to Frustration. Frustration leads to desperation. Desperation, the opposite of patience, becomes the playground of the devil.
But the mind that forgets the objective is easily led astray, like a float on the ocean.
The mind creates and constructs and in construction it prepares the inevitable destruction of all civilization. God’s land is developed and in development, many are left without homes. Home becomes a price to be paid. An investment. Home is no longer shelter for the body but a statement of your status in life. Those who speak of the Supreme even revel in this statement. They support by their doing.
Your doing describes you clearly than a thousand words you speak. You become what you do.
The mind creates a system that purports to serve humans. It argues and it innovates. In time, the humans become slaves of the system, their new master, monster. The mind alone. The heartless mind.
We have established institutions that train the mind alone. We prioritize them. We glorify them. So can destruction be avoided by our systematic planning of the destruction itself?
The nightmare of the heart. The seat of creativity and self-nourishment. The very center of self-destruction and madness. The heart knows nothing but feelings and itself. The pure heart[3] recognizes no in betweens or half ways. It does or it doesn’t. It unleashes passion and power beyond its own control. Santim Raj remembers the death and destruction arising from his friend’s love for his beloved.
Ramana, his friend had fallen in love with Sharina. Both their parents objected to the relationship on grounds of religion, culture and race. Ramana was 26, educated, talented and holding an important position is the business industry. His parents are multi-millionaries and had he wanted, he could just live off his parents’ wealth. And even this, his parents offered him to leave Sharina. It pained his mother that he should want to marry someone alien to the culture of her forefathers.
The entire episode left his mother devastated and his father hopelessly lost. In the sadness and the humiliation her society generously placed on her, his mother died. Ramana left his home which had sheltered and loved him for 26 years to be with a stranger he has known only for 4 years. His love was blind to the sufferings he is causing around him for it yearns only the love of his beloved.
And Sharina? Her entire society was aghast that she would even consider marrying a heretic, a kafir. Her silent mother could only cry tears of begging her daughter to understand. Her father was praying to the Supreme that his daughter be saved from the raging fires of hell. And he had to do something to save his daughter’s soul, even if it means killing her if she went ahead with her blasphemous designs.
And they did. Sharina and Ramana did get married in an unconventional way in their conventional society. They had broken all norms. They have challenged all limits. They have dared to love. And yet in their love, their hearts have hardened to the yearnings of those who loved them and cared for them.
One night, the room rented by Ramana and his wife was broken into. They were both sleeping. Ramana remembers a struggle, a fight and the last words of his wife: “ I will always love you”. When he wakes up, the motionless bloodied, body of his wife welcomes him. And he cries a loud cry that fills the sky, which no one hears.
And you, arrogant fool, think you know what love is?
Santim has read and seen many wars fought on the waves of emotions. Homes destroyed, children mutilated and women humiliated. Fellow humans descending to levels lower than animals by following their hearts alone. Senseless, irrational cruelties evoked by drumming up emotions. The mind swallowed by the passion of the heart. Follow your heart is good advice. Follow your heart is dangerous advice. The mindless heart.
Oh you ignorant man, think you know what the heart is and preach you that alone!
The mind and the heart. The heart and the mind. Which? Why? Santim knows many pretend they have the answers. Santim knows many believe they have the answers. They mistake their journey for the ultimate Truth. Like the wanderer who thinks he has arrived by just walking. So they preach what they are learning, not what they have known[4].
In preaching, they forget to listen but to their own voice, their own dreams, their own mind, their own hearts. Slowly becoming self-centric, they preach and they talk, talk, and talk. Forgetting to listen, they stop learning. Death of learning gives birth to fantasy.
Mouth. You have one mouth and it wants to talk, talk and talk. Alas you forget, the Supreme gave you two ears and a heart to listen! And a mind to think…..
To remind himself, Santim looks into his mind and heart and recalls a poem that he had once written.
If
The corners of the world
Were freed of cobwebs
The walls brightly painted
The space
Faithfully decorated
With toys,
Snacks,
Games
And everyone
A participant
By choice or chance
And the game begins
Without a whistle
Such that none knows
when it begins
When it ends
If
The entire world
Transforms into paradise
Need the dusts
In the hearts
Not be wiped first?
THEN????
End of chapter 4.
Hi,
ReplyDeleteIt is so beautiful. Thanks